It’s a beautiful Monday morning. Although the sun is shining, it is rather brisk outside so it’s a day for indoor chores. I just finished my necessary chores and decided to take a few minutes to relax. While sitting at the computer I looked at a few files and I happened upon some folders that had copies of some old family slides. So, of course, what was only going to be a few minutes turned into a lot longer. Without getting too side tracked, I find that since retiring I find myself getting side tracked more often than ever before. I guess I just never allowed myself the time, and knowing now I make my own time, I seem to go down these paths often. So through the old photos I went.
- We all remember Smoky the Bear. My brother and I on one of our family vacations.
They bring back such memories. The family, the vacations, the parties and just life in general. Some of the photos only bring back vague memories while others seem like they just happened yesterday. I look at myself, at these young years and think if only I had known what was ahead for me. I wish I could take back some of the bad things, and sure wish I was smarter when dealing with others. I have been at many forks in the road in my life and wish I could have talked to that little girl and forewarned her about what was to come. But alas, we do not have that capability to look into the future, only backwards, and hope that we feel we have accomplished our goals, or at least we are on our way. We need to be happy with ourselves and where we are, have enjoyed our families and friends, not taken things for granted, and have gotten to this point in life where although we all have regrets, I hope that the regrets are less than all the positives.
I do remember when we were young we couldn’t wait to grow up. Then grown, I couldn’t wait to get married, the next house, the next job, etc……. There was always something waiting to get done. I sit here now at a juncture trying to figure out what I yet have to get done. I haven’t found my “thing”. Now I have no idea what that “thing” is, but I guess when I find it I will know it, but I can certainly say at this time I have no clue what I’m waiting for, what yet I want to achieve, or what yet I want to do. I always had something to look forward to and I feel right now I don’t have this. Is it because I’m content in my life right now? It makes one think, can I see myself spending the rest of my days like today. I know that answer and it certainly is “no”. So if it’s no, then what will I do with myself during this journey? That is a question that will not be answered today, and most likely not tomorrow either. I’m sort of hoping that something will just pop in my head, you know, one of those “ah ha” moments, but I don’t think the chances of this happening are high. I am hoping over the next few months of trying new activities and meeting new people I will find what I’m looking for and how I want to spend the next years, but until then it was a day for remembering and looking at old photos in awe, remembering how naive we were and how all of life was in front of us. Well, all of life is not in front anymore, much of it is behind me, so although I need some time to figure out my remaining life plan, I will find what I’m looking for and down that road I will go, with all the exuberance and excitement as I had when I was younger. Knowing and appreciating my time more, the new roads I am approaching will be taken with care, but with an excitement that comes with exploring, learning, sharing and finding new things.
I have attached a few photos of when I was very young to help me remember that each day is a blessing and that we should appreciate what we have, never give up our excitement for life and to always remain positive while embracing the future. Don’t stop learning, remember to smile, and find something you enjoy and be happy you are healthy enough to be able to partake of these things. I’m a little concerned that my road is a little foggy right now, but I’m sure over the years I’ve had not only some foggy areas, but also some slippery roads, and yet I’m here today, happy with what I’ve accomplished and excited that I’m healthy enough that I still have time to accomplish more. Memories are wonderful, and it’s nice at times to reflect, but it’s the today and tomorrow that we need to focus on. To mine and your roads yet traveled, let’s go out and find our super highway.
Younger days, my entire life in front of me!